I've been saying off and on around here that I was/might/probably would be looking for a new job. But that just didn't happen for the longest of time, simply because I procrastinate as if I were trying to contend for the title of World Champion of Procrastination or something.
And so that is how the story went, up until a week or so ago when I was called in for an interview. It blew my mind, but then it didn't. I mean I was getting in due part because of one of the guys I used to work with, is working with this company now. He put in the good word for me, yadda, yadda, yadda.
Anyway, so fast forward to today and my girlfriend and I get home to find a message on our answering machine. Lo and behold, it was the H.R. person.
This is all good and what not, but as I feared this does put me in a slight bind. Actually, I think it is more about how I am putting myself into this bind rather then the other way around. You see, my current employer is slowly, yet surely going downhill. They can't find good workers and they've been having a bitch of a time in trying to replace their managers (who've been going down, slowly, one by one).
Now I don't want to look like a deserter, a guy who bailed out when the going looked bad. Stupid me tries to be loyal in a world where I know (in the back of my mind) is a courtesy that is oft not returned. Especially not at a 9-5 job.
Ok, alright... to cut a long and boring writing to a minimum, my biggest problem as of right now is if I should stay with my present employer AND try and work this new job together? Or should I say sayonara and focus solely on one job?
What bums me out all the more is the fact that I know with my leaving of my current employer, is I'd be forever on the shit list of my boss. Evidently, the guy does not take well to losing long time guys. I mean, ever try working with a 30 something year old guy who sulks around and has this angry Japanese I-KILL-YOU-IF-I-COULD look on his face? Damn near impossible and that is speaking from experience.
Even still though, the point I am trying to get at is I want to try and leave (if it comes down to that) on a good note. I was raised with the idea that it is not a good idea to "burn the bridge" when leaving a job and I'd like not to. But the more I think about it, the more it seems that that is just not possible.
In the end, I guess regardless of how my boss reacts and the situation of the company, I gotta watch out for my own ass here. A fact once told to me by my mom rings through my head right now about how, regardless of my stupid loyalty ideals, these guys don't pay my bills, don't ensure that I have a roof over my head and probably wouldn't piss on me if I were on fire. Or however that saying goes...
Damn it! I wish I could just come to a conclusion or a solution that I can live with. I know I can't please everyone here... but shit...
My head hurts, thank god I have a 3 day weekend to stew over this mess in my brain cells. ><
2 comments:
Paying the bills and making sure you have a roof over your head is priority number one. Also, it's not like it's just you. You've got your girlfriend to think about, too. And just because it's the 21st century, that doesn't mean that she has to totally fend for herself in this relationship. ;-)
If you enjoyed your job, then I agree that there would be more of an issue with leaving. But the way I figured out who you were when I found out where you worked? I looked for the grumpiest, most pissed off looking guy there...lol.
So question #1: Does the new job pay more?
Question #2: Do you think you'll enjoy your new job?
If you answered "yes" to both questions, then that should make your decision easy.
I know change is REALLY difficult. But it's also the only thing in life that never changes. As humans, we are amazingly adaptable to new things. School starts for me on Monday, so I'll be working less. Change. It's freaking me out, but it will all work out for the better. How do I know? Because I'll make sure it does. My life. My responsibility. Yadda, yadda, yadda. :)
(Sorry, didn't mean to lecture for so long!)
Wow, did I look THAT pissed off and grumpy?
True, I can't argue with anything you've mentioned. I've more or less come to those conclusions myself and even my girlfriend said that while I might try too much sometimes, it is just impossible to always please everyone. I didn't want to piss anyone off or anything, but I'll just go with what I need to do and however the shit falls, well... that'll be that.
And it does pay more, though I think this new job will mean working even harder then ever. But the opportunities tied to it are just too much to ignore.
Anyway, thanks for the thoughtful words. It is amazing how much everything that came up during these past 2 days have helped make this whole thought process a lot easier.
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