I remember the day I bought my PS2, many long years ago now. What is even more vivid to me was the excitement, the pure joy of just owning it, to have and hold it and play some of the most awesome games made. Yeah, it was pretty damn good!Which brings me to the present and I should be absolutely thrilled to have a XBox 360. I know I've been waiting and wanting to get into some of the "Next-Gen" consoles. So why the lack of joy you may wonder? Well my luck with this next generation crap has been nothing short of mind numbing to say the very least about it.
It all started with a trip to Sam Goody, since my girlfriend and I saw a sign saying how you could get a free game with the purchase of a XBox 360. Now the cheap bastard in me is screaming " Go! Go!! GO!!!" and so without so much as a self-induced argument, there we go. It gets even better inside, what do I see? Another sign that says you can even get a $30 mail-in rebate!
Can this be paradise? Is Heaven truly for real?
Short answer pertaining to this topic: NOPE.
My ride on cloud nine was short and sweet and being shot down was pretty harsh. Side note: How screwed up can you be to not even know your own store's specials? Some people need to lay off the drugs I think...
Anyway...
We were quickly clued in that the sign out front was only for a Christmas special. HUH!? Christmas!? What month are we in again? Oh snap, JUNE! Looks like more then a half dozen people have been slacking off to miss a sign that was for a special 6 months prior!
Oh and that rebate is only for the XBox 360 Elite. Did the sign say anything about it? Nope. Did I want to stand and argue with a bunch of durrrs? Absolutely not. I'd rather play in traffic, either way I know I felt my IQ drop ever so much.
OK, so that was definitely not going to happen at least not with that loverly store. Next destination: GameStop. They must be better right? Right!??
I took one look inside and felt my headache begin. Just looking at the people working there just gave me that feeling like that shit isn't going to happen. Not a good sign. So rather then taking a chance and coming out even more pissed off then before, girlfriend and I made a U-Turn and went to what I had deemed my "only hope."
Wal-Mart.
Granted, I have never had any troubles with this store (or company) before, so I was fairly certain I was safe. Little did I know, this would be the beginning of the end!
Picking up the system was no problem, no incident, no anything. Absolutely uneventful as it should have been and I was happy for it. How couldn't I be happy after that skull crushing back at Sam Goody!
I get home and open the box and plug in what I thought to have been my brand new XBox 360. I was surprised to see that it didn't prompt any type of set up of any kind, which usually proceed new things like game consoles and computers. That shot up some red flags and I hoped what I thought was wrong and maybe it didn't need to be set up.
I was wrong.
The game console I had was not brand spankin' new, rather it was a second hand (and broken) piece of crap. Either that or XBox 360s come pre-loaded with a game save and gamer profiles...?
Unlikely.
But I was willing to overlook this and it played a game just fine. I went through with playing XBox Live Arcade games, then onto Ninety Nine Nights without a problem. Now I wanted to try Viva Pinata and so I put the disk in and press the button and there it goes.
Then came the white screen. Oh how I hate to see a white screen. And what does it tell me? I should put this disk into a XBox 360.
...
Huh?
And here I thought I had one of those! Silly me!
So after switching games a couple of times and being met with the same fate, I did the only thing I could do. I got on the phone and called everyone I knew and cried up a storm! I demanded they take up arms and that we march to this Wal-Mart with stakes and torches and whatever pointy object we had and drive them out! FOREVER!
Oops, ok I didn't do most of that but I did get on the phone and I did call the store. So all I needed to do was bring it back in and they would exchange it.
Great.
Fast forward to 6am (the next morning), and there I am on the bus with what should have been a new console sitting on my lap. I was beaten, but I was not out of the game yet... no, I was convinced that this would be over quickly and this ordeal would be done and over.
So I get to Wal-Mart and I bring my second hand and broken console to customer service. Not to be mean, but the girl that helped me... I wasn't sure if she had her eye on me or the wall... or both. At the same time. Ok, that is mean... sorry...
Or am I?
We will now commence the beatings!
So a rep from electronics comes out with another guy and we all walk to the electronics department so they can plug it in and see what the problem is. I had been explaining to them along the way (which I think only the clothes ranks were paying any heed) that the system worked fine when it did, but it just wouldn't play games consistently.
We get to a TV and this pair were immediately stumped by the box. I kid you not! Feeling a small measure of pity (which I would regret later), I lend a hand in defeating this monster of a box and they go on with their plugging and what not.
Then comes the fun of the wireless controller. One of the pair asks "Where is the thing you plug the control into?" And here I am thinking "And these guys are the qualified to tell ME what's wrong? Oh shit..."
Oh shit was right folks, oh was it ever right.
So despite what I tell them, they proceed to put a demo disk in and... it worked! So now I have everyone and their mom and pet pig questioning me as if maybe I was trying something here.
Maybe it was my games? Nope, all were brand new.
Maybe it got hot? Err... no comment...
But the feeling I got was that these people believed I was trying to con them maybe or pull something. I don't know, but my mind couldn't figure out what kind of con I'd be pulling where I would by a game console the night before and come back at 6am to try and rip them off...? I couldn't grasp it and I still can't to be honest.
Anyway, so again I bring up the fact that it also appeared to have been used before I had. I swear, the looks on some of their faces were priceless. I was told quite sternly that that sort of thing is impossible because it has this cheap clear sticker that seals the box. Funny, we had just defeated the box earlier WITHOUT HAVING TO GO THROUGH ANY STICKER SEAL!! Hell, I didn't even know it had one...
So after more assinine questioning and with their compairing UPC codes to recipects, I realize that this little exchange wasn't quick and I was in the store for almost a hour at this point! So finally one of them says out loud "Try putting the game in again! He said it didn't work when he did that!"
And sure enough, it was a no go... did it matter? No, everyone walked away by this point and there I stood. When someone finally did come back, I was told that this was the final exchange since they saw nothing wrong and they can't sell it because of the open box (which one of the two original geniuses ripped open some) and how it was still impossible for them to have sold me a used system.
By the point I just wanted to get the hell out of there and get home. So I get my exchange (finally) and I'm heading out, I see the same rep plugging in the XBox 360 again and what did I see? The red ring of doom! As I understand it, that pops up with something is WRONG with the system.
Me telling the truth... imagine that?
Moral of this story: Next generation is a real pain in the ass compaired to the PS2 haydays. And as far as I'm concerned, Wal-Mart being the only hope? Hell no. They have been redubbed "The Absolute, Final and Desperately Last Resort." Meaning, I ain't buying a goddamn thing from them unless my life depended on it and the catch here is... well... it ain't!
Last thought and sorry for the rant, but that has been bugging me ever since: Mr. Kennedy (pictured above) is on RAW! Damn I wish I had TV these days...
I wonder how long it will be before Kennedy becomes the top champ, be it WWE Champion, World Heavyweight Champion or ECW Champion. I listed them all because who knows? Kennedy might be shifted else where before he wins the top prize.
